So, I mentioned that I had family in town and as soon as they left, I was going to get real with this thing. They've been gone for about four hours - I think I'm running a little behind. :)
Let me give just a super-fast recap of my journey, for those of you who might be new readers. I used to weigh 300 pounds. Then I finally found a doctor who was able to help me figure out what I needed to do for me - I needed to go off grains and increase my vegetable intake substantially. Oh, and going off sugar and caffeine didn't hurt either. I lost 88 pounds in less than a year. Then a whole bunch of stuff happened (read: drama) and I fell off my wagon. I'm working on not being too harsh with myself on that, but I do feel bad that I didn't handle my stress better. I've since gained back about thirty.
I want to break this down and look at the reasons why I gained back this weight. It's my hope that by doing this, I'll see it more clearly, and perhaps I can trigger something in you that will be helpful on your journey as well.
I think the #1 reason I fell off the wagon is that I simply became way too busy and I wasn't preparing meals. Then I'd dash out the door to run an errand, realize I hadn't eaten in hours and hours, and know that if I didn't do it right that minute, I was going to pass out. So I'd grab a sandwich at a drive-through.
Problem: Not preparing Solution: Concentrating on preparing, making cooking a higher priority Rule: I may not leave the house until I have eaten.
The #2 reason is pretty closely tied to the first. I run a freelance editing company and I have a very healthy number of clients. My business is entirely run online and on my laptop, and turning on my laptop is the second thing I do every day. (The first is to go potty.) I will often get on my laptop and stay there for a couple of hours as I answer my e-mails and lay the foundation for my workday. Then I get in the shower, etc. Food simply isn't on my radar at this point, and it usually takes feeling dizzy or sick for me to realize that I haven't eaten.
Problem: Forgetting to eat. Solution: Establishing regular eating routines. Rule: I may not turn on the computer until I've eaten some breakfast.
Just as a quick note, when I was living my diet, I was eating really regularly, and losing sometimes six pounds a week. Eating regularly is a very good thing.
The #3 reason is that I'm an emotional eater. Whenever I start to get stressed, I automatically start thinking about food. The last three years of my life have been so full of stress, I can't even begin to explain it. We're talking, ugly. I was chugging along, doing all right, and lost the 88 pounds, but then it's like my coping mechanisms got broken and I didn't have a backup plan. So I turned to food again.
Problem: Using food as a crutch. Solution: Find things that really do help, like taking proactive measures and giving myself time off and delegating. Rule: As of right now, I'm back off sugar.
There are other issues at play here, like working out loss of self-esteem and so forth, but these are the major reasons I've gained back some weight, and so I'll start by addressing these. I think this is a great starting point for me.
I'll update you on how I do, and I will also share what I'm eating, etc. I'm going total accountability here starting tomorrow morning, so be prepared because I'm probably going to do some whining and stuff.
In the meantime, we're going to be joined by some new bloggers soon, and it will be fun to get to know them.