Saturday, January 30, 2010

Need a Boost

I'm feeling a bit disheartened today.

I've been watching my caloric intake and my fat intake, and I've been exercising. I've been taking my thyroid medication, drinking my water, and doing everything else we all know we're supposed to do in order to lose weight.

And yet, today I weighed in at 278.8, which is more than I weighed a week ago. Last week I weighed 277.2.

I keep giving myself pep talks. "Tristi, this is awesome! You started this thing at 284.5, and so you've lost some weight! Good for you!"

I also remind myself that muscle weighs more than fat, and since I'm doing strength training, it's natural that I would see a difference in how the weight comes off.

My husband and kids are telling me I look skinnier than ever, which isn't true because they've all seen me much skinnier, but their support is awesome.

Today I'm just having a hard time supporting myself.

When you're as overweight as I am, there are times when it seems like a hopeless battle. A thinner woman can lose five pounds and it shows up immediately. A larger woman has to lose quite a bit before those around her start to notice. There are days when it would be so easy to just quit trying.

But I'm not going to quit trying. I'm committed to this battle until the end. I want to go clothes shopping and have to buy all new clothes because nothing I own fits, and I want to buy really cute clothes and feel like a million dollars in them. I want to stop being the fattest person there when I go somewhere. I want to look as sassy on the outside as I feel on the inside. I want to be healthy and have energy.

So I'm definitely not giving up.

I'm just having a moment. Don't worry - I'll snap out of it.


Sunny said...

I have those days too. I had been working out really well, eating right, and then two weeks ago I got a really bad flu that turned into a really bad bronchitis. I haven't worked out and I have just eaten whatever was easy and yummy. I have gained 4 pounds. Ugh! But I started back to working out today and I am trying to stay positive. You are SO not alone. :)

berlinwritergirl said...

You can do it! I gained four pounds overnight last week which was awful, but the next day it was off. That day was the worst though. I wouldn't sweat over a pound unless it keeps going up. You are right about the strength training thing. Good Luck!

Marta O. Smith said...

Have you taken your measurements? You should keep track of your upper arms, bust, waist, hips, thighs, and calves. Measure once a week, so you can see the difference. (Used to do this at my Diet Center weigh-ins eons ago.) What the scale says may not be the gospel truth, especially if you are strength training. Lean muscle weighs more and takes up less space than fat. So take heart, and pull out that measuring tape. You're doing everything right. It's got to show up somewhere.

Shanna Blythe said...

I'm with Marta. Take your measurements. If you are gaining muscle you're losing size. It's amazing how much less room muscle takes up. I already posted about this, but my friend who is maybe just a little taller than me, and we are probably around the same bone frame size--well she just exercises. She weighs 194 and is almost to a size 12. I weigh 198 and I'm still in a solid high 16. And I look bigger than her by far!

Sorry about your moment! We all have them as we attempt to lose weight. It DOES help to have people notice. The first time I attempted weight loss I think I probably lost 15 pounds. No one said a thing and I gave up. I mean if I'd lost that much weight and no on says anything? What's the point? It wasn't until I'd lost around forty pounds that people started saying stuff. Yeah. LAME. But there it is.

Tristi said...

Thanks, guys!! I really appreciate your comments. I will pull out the measuring tape and have at it.

What I need to keep remembering is that success is measured by how we feel. I'm already feeling more powerful and more in control, and that's a huge blessing.

Rebecca Talley said...

I've lost almost 30 lbs and hardly anyone has noticed. Only my sister and my family and one or two other people have even said anything so it is discouraging to work hard and have no one notice. But, we have to keep going. I'm excited to see the new you in April!

I agree about taking measurements. I used to do that 100 years ago when I was at BYU for a class and I've started again. I've been through a few scales over the years (my kids were weighing sheep on my favorite one and left it in the rain and it was ruined) so it's hard to compare weight because scales can measure it so differently. But, a measuring tape doesn't change and can be much more accurate.

I've also felt discouraged because I haven't been able to move from my weight--still want to lose 10 lbs. I've also felt discouraged with my writing, a friend passed away, and I've been stranded without a vehicle because my driveway is a mess from the snow. So it's been a tough week or so. BUT, it's a new week and we can all make a fresh start. So, let's not be discouraged and fresh courage take :). We're awesome, right? Right!!

Tristi Pinkston said...

Really? Like, actual, literal sheep? Wow ... never heard of that before. :)

I'm sorry you're having a rough time, Rebecca! Maybe your sheep can go shovel the driveway? :)

hi, it's me! melissa c said...

Girl! Do the hcg diet! You should just do it. Get off that yo yo. Your base weight has been set it sounds like and your body will NOT let go unless you do something different.

Consider the hcg or that peptin diet. It doesn't hurt to have help and it makes it so much easier. Email me if you want more info! I'm rooting for you!

Sandra said...

Love you Tristi.

Tristi said...

Remind me how much that costs, Melissa - I need to see if it's possible.